How to Build a Backyard Den

So, it turns out that in a country where it often rains, it’s essential to have a place to go with your mates that’s neither outside OR inside. This place is called a den. Not unlike a fort or tree house, a den can be fancy or in our case a shanty made from whatever scrap we could find laying about.

STEP 1:  Analyze your materials. What can we use this for? Nothing it turns out...too big, too much work for slapping something together to remove all the planks and nails.

STEP 2: Analyze the potential den site. If nothing else, it gives you an excuse to climb on to things you’re not supposed to.

STEP 3: Make sure you have some kind of roof, because the primary goal is to get out of the rain. This old door should work.

STEP 4: Review the in-progress construction and materials...looks fairly bleak, but the boys seem to like it.

STEP 5: Wonder about smashing things. This is important...it makes the boys feel like they’re building something, even though all they’re doing is breaking wood into kindling and fighting over tools.

STEP 6: Make sure the little ones get involved...Ollie obviously doesn’t approve. He’s thinking: “The roof overhead is full of gaps! When it rains this den will be just as wet as it would be without the rubbish roof! Is this some kind of task engineered for the silly psychological satisfaction of constructing something that has no apparent value other than keeping us busy?!!” Yes Ollie, yes it is.

STEP 7: Get a feel for the den’s potential, spotting problems to be fixed while claiming ownership of the den. Merrit seems hopeful that rain will not come through the giant gaps in the door above.

STEP 8: Get a bunch of girls to tell you how much better their den is. This solidifies a "girls only" den and a "boys only" den. Who cares if they have a fridge! We can throw rocks farther!

STEP 9: When in doubt, add carpet.

STEP 10: Look tough in your new den, it tells everyone to keep out! Secret stuff is going to happen here, secret plans and plotting. Now...we’re hungry. Let’s go inside.